The seeds of Anger, Despair, Sadness, Jealousy, Greed and all other negative emotions dwell in a desirous and a clingy mind.
A Mind that intently clings to a sense of self, a sense of fairness, commitments, opinions, views, ambitions, identities, material objects, possessions, relationships etc.
So, the moment there is a perception of threat or disruption to any of the aforementioned objects, it panics. Panic gives rise to negative thoughts about the future.
These negative thoughts are accompanied by unpleasant sensations in the body. The breath becomes heavy and erratic. Sometimes parts of the body get heated.
The nerves get ruffled. There is heartburn, shivering, palpitation etc. Other times there is pain in certain areas of the body.
These unpleasant physiological sensations along with negative thoughts manifest into a negative emotional state.
Anger is one such state. The emotion of anger comes in various degrees. It ranges from mild agitation to full-fledged psychotic rage.
It often manifests in people that have a headstrong personality. People like these are more reactive and quicker to fly into a rage, than others. They raise hell when in rage.
Any person or situation becomes miserable and unpleasant when contacted by them.
When the anger subsides and the person comes to his senses, he often feels guilt and self-loathing. He questions his ability to be in control of his emotions and looks for ways to deal with anger.
Here are some ways Anger can be dealt with:
By not Clinging
Learn to let go. Nothing lasts forever. Everything ends, everyone dies. Nothing remains. Just calm down and take it easy.
Being kind to oneself
Being extra critical of oneself leaves a person exhausted and disappointed at the end of the day. In his disappointment he forgets to smile, becomes irritated and turns into unpleasant company.
One should try to not set huge goals for oneself that often end up sucking the very life out of him. Therefore, its advisable to treat oneself with dignity, kindness and respect.
Remembering to breathe deeply
Have you noticed that your breath loses its natural flow, the moment you feel agitated? Does it not become heavy and short? What this should tell you is that the flow of breath is deeply connected with the state of your mind.
So, in order to bring back your mind from a state of agitation to that of normalcy, one should practice deep breathing. Concentrating on the breath would take your mind off the object of disturbance and calm it down.
By Being Alert
The mind should be developed to be sensitive and alert. An alert and sensitive mind instantly takes cognizance of a change in the mental or physiological state of the body.
Such a mind can detect negative thoughts and perceptions in the mind before they become strong enough to hijack the physiological processes.
By isolating oneself, when in anger
To avoid hurting someone or doing something stupid, while in a state of anger, it’s advisable to isolate oneself until the anger recedes.
This helps mitigate the effect one’s anger has the people around.
Asking for help
There is no shame in asking for professional help, in case of extreme anger management issues. One can also ask his friends and family for help.